The little princess phone danced about, as it’s shrill ring penetrated Josey’s sweet slumber. Fumbling for the phone, she glanced at the clock. Oh my word, she thought, it’s after one o’clock. Once again, her medicinal tonic had done its job, lulling her into a medicated sleep.
“Josey’s Dippity Do, what can I do for you?” she methodically recited. Balancing the phone with her shoulder, she looked in the mirror and wiped the smudge marks under her eyes, gave her hair a pat and lit a cigarette.
“Sure honey, I’ve got an opening at 2:30. Your name? Mandy...Mandy Brennan. Why I’ve been dying to meet you, I understand your husband is the new pastor at Trinity church. You just come on in and I’ll get you all fixed up. No, don’t worry about the late notice, we don’t stand on ceremony here in Carington. Okay hon, see you this afternoon.”
If there had been cream on her lips she would have licked them like a Cheshire cat. Excitement sent Josey scurrying around the shop and Corky scampering about.
“Now Corky, don’t go getting all excited. The last thing I need, is you passing gas in here. Go lay down out of mama’s way while I make a call.” Her fingers rapidly punched out Tootsie’s number. Blowing smoke rings into the air, she impatiently tapped her foot in unison with the whirling fan.
“Come on Tootsie, pick up the phone.”
“Hey Josey, what’s up?” Tootsie wheezed.
“What have you been doing that’s got you so out of breath?” asked Josey.
“You’re not gonna believe this, but I was trying to get into that new pair of jeans I just bought last week. You remember, the cute ones that have those sunflowers on the back pockets. I swear, I have told Harriet, my new cleaning woman, a hundred times not to change the setting on the dryer and she continues to ignore me. She has shrunken every piece of clothing I have.”
Josey took another drag of her cigarette and shook her head. She had seen the amount of food that Tootsie had been packing away, but had chalked it up to Tootsie’s irritation with Hank’s newest fling.
Tootsie scooped the cream out of a golden Twinkie. “What’s up?”
Josey paced the room. “Remember how everyone was talking about the new pastor coming to that Pentecostal palace in town? Well his wife is coming in this afternoon to get her hair done. Lord only knows what she is going to be like. You better be praying for me, you never know what those kind of people can bring in with them. I hope she doesn’t go into those tongues I’ve heard about. If she does, I’m just going to have to tell her, we don’t abide by those kinds of things. I can’t have that devil stuff going on in here. You’ve got to drop by and get a look at her yourself, and don’t tell me you’re too busy. You can give yourself a pedicure. If you’re going to be showing off that new toe ring tonight, you want those toes to look nice don’t you?”
“Calm down Josey, you’re talking so fast I can hardly understand you. And yes, I will stop by,” sighed Tootsie. “I’ll see you right after lunch, but you are going to owe me for this one. Didn’t you say Karen was coming in this afternoon? You know I can’t stand that women,” she whined.
“Tootsie Turrelson, she is the pastor’s wife and you’ve got to make peace with her.”
Like a two year old, Tootsie pouted. “Peace with her? She has never liked me and you know it. I keep waiting for the Lord to grab her up by the scruff of her neck and just shake her until her face turns as red as that mop of hair on her fat head. But I’ll be there because I can’t wait to meet the new pastor’s wife. What did you say her name was?”
“Mandy,” said Josey, rolling her eyes towards heaven. “You’re two seconds away from here, so step on it. Bye.”
Stay tuned for the next episode!
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